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When couples begin to drift apart in their marriage, it can be like two people leading separate lives, under one roof.
Someone said that it takes two people to make a marriage work, and only one to destroy it. When there is or has been abuse of some kind, the injured party has some assessing and re-assessing to do. There have been cases where the abuser has changed, and the marriage was renewed. These cases, of course, are very rare.
When a spouse has come to the crossroads of deciding to stay or leave the relationship,
it can be helpful to make an inventory of the relationship. It is as simple as listing the benefits in one column, and the deficits in the other.
Along with seeking their Higher Power, it can be quite instrumental in the healing process for the partners to each receive counseling. Part of the reason for this, is that unless the thoughts that led up to that time are dealt with, and adjusted as necessary, repetition is inevitable.